Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical. – Sophia Loren
I like black women way more than white women. For a long time – like till last Saturday – I thought it was because they have better bodies. They do, in general, but more important than that are their eyes. At least among American women.
Sometimes when I look into the eyes of a black woman and she looks back something inside me melts. It is an experience that I have had with black women over and over again, like just this morning. I wound up marrying one, one of those black women with the eyes that make me melt.
These days, now that I am married, I look away: no good can come of it. But even when I look away her face is burned into my mind. I cannot stop thinking about her. If she is sitting across from me on the subway train, it takes everything in me not to look back at her again. I try to read my book but I keep reading the same words over and over because they no longer make sense. My mind becomes a thousand knots.
But with white American women this sort of thing is rare – even with those who seem to like me. I can only remember one time, though there may be others that I forget. It is nowhere near as common as with black women.
With black women it is like their eyes go all the way down to their souls, down to their hearts. Not all of them, but some of them, enough of them. I know that may surprise those who think black women are hard as nails, the Sapphire stereotype.
With white women their eyes do not seem to go so deep, it seems to stop somewhere just behind their eyes. Sometimes their eyes even look empty, soulless.
I do not think it was always like that with white women, not at least if you go by Hollywood films. Elizabeth Taylor, Sophia Loren and Audrey Hepburn in the 1950s all had beautiful, amazing eyes. I could look at them forever.
But these days most white actresses in Hollywood either have this empty look in their eyes, like Lindsay Lohan, or this brightness to them that does not seem to run very deep, like the Olsen twins – they have beautiful eyes but there does not seem to be much behind them. Almost like doll eyes.
The eyes of white women have grown cold of any true feeling – not all of them, of course, but too many of them. That is how it seems. Like their smiles, the look in their eyes does not seem to be in touch with their hearts.
In old books you read about white men falling in love with white women when their eyes meet: time stands still and all that. That is the sort of thing I am talking about. Do white men still fall in love that way? Or, for that matter, does anyone?
See also:
Interesting. I’ve noted the same thing many times. To this day, when I look into my wife’s deep, dark, inscrutable eyes, I am transfixed.
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My wife is Mongolian and he eyes are just as amazing to me.
As long as there is love and kindness, that is all that matters.
Perhaps it is the look that is in so many European eyes that gives us pause.
Question to consider regarding what is white?
Do you consider people from Spain and Portugal White?
Are they in the same class as English, French and American. It appears to me that the greatest players of the Slave Trade, the masters of imperialism, were the Spanish, yet their culture is not thrown under the same banner of scorn.
I work in advertising and I was recently doing some work for a resort in the Dominican Republic. This history of that country, the brutality done by the Spanish in the name of god, was as bas as anything.
Hmmm..
Food for thought. Wherever you see a cross in an island nation, you should be thinking of what Spain did to plant it there. Are they too then white?
Let the comments come!!!
-Stal
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the sister has sedulous eyes
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Her eyes.
Trying to type in between campaigns.
her eyes.
-Stal
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If you don’t believe someone HAS a soul, you won’t see it in their eyes, even if it’s there. I’m involved in dsability rights. One thing I find interesting – peoplewith bigoted views of severely mentally disabled people always say things like”You can see in their eyes that they’re not really living. They’re empty.” But if you look at images like these, you ca see that their eyes aren’t empty at all:
http://www.adamwolfond.blogspot.com/
I watched a documentary about the British empirein which photographs of “savages” were shown to demonstrate that they had “soulless eyes.” Looking at the photographs, I had no idea what they meant.
I feel guilty writing these words because you will never harm me physically or take away my freedom. You will neverhave any significant influence over how the majority of society sees me. Your words won’t ever hurt anything more than my emotions. It won’t make me pull over and show you my licence dozens of times for no reason (especially since I can’t drive for medical reasons anyway.) It won’t deny me a job or a college place or a home or even a taxi. It won’t get me harrased or beaen or imprisoned or killed. It won’t damage anything bt my feelings. And it feels trivial and bitchy to care about something and small
No, I don’t think it’s cruel to say “I find black women sexier than white women.” Or that you find their eyes more aesthetically pleasing. The media is very white-dominated and I imagine it does a lot of women good to realise there isn’t ONE ideal of beauty.
What’s cruel is to extrapolate things about people’s characters based on their appearance. Especially considering your opinion on white women’s appearance is probably skewed by your opinions of our collective morals which you have shown in previous posts.
” You do not seem to be talking to a real person; you do not know their true feelings. There is the outer person that is pleasing, of course, but then there is an inner person that is hidden.”
I’ve been told I’m “not the wole person I was meant to be” because of my disabiities. I’ve never been told I’m not a real person before. Ow. Ow. Ow. I would literally rather be punched in the face. And saying that makes me feel worse about pointing this flaw out to you, because I know “my” people have made “your” people live whole lives thinking that AND kicked in their ribs and broken them and done millions of worse things and that I will NEVER imagine that pain and don’t want to be able to imagine it. But it is still wrong to say that about anyone. EVER. I accept that power corrupts. I accept that white women in America and Europe have more power than black women of the same class as them. Because of that, we are prbably generally less moral than black women. If you believe in hristianity, you should feel sorry for us, because we’re more likely to end up in Hell than “your” women. Also, you need to remember
A. Every rule has exceptions
B. If your ancestor had ben imperialists and mine hadn’t, black women would be the less moral ones.
C. There is a huge difference between being a bad person and not being a real person at all. As a matter of fact, if we’re not “real people” there is no point in protesting against racism. No appeal to morality will dissuade us.
D. Inever ASKED for unfair advantages. I accepted them unquestioningy and will answer for that in the afterlife. But I never sought them actively.
Also, you have a lot of posts listing the flaws you perceive in white people in general. You also have a lot of posts on the flaws of white women, which go into a lot of detail. I see none about white men, despite the fact that white men have always been the most powerful and because of this done the most harm. Is this a Hillary thing?
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P.S Rachel Weisz has awesome eyes.
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sanabituranima:
Rachel Weisz is beautiful. Thanks.
I never said that white women are not real people or that they are soulless – just that they come off that way all too often. I got to write it as I see it or it is not worth writing.
I do believe in Christianity, even though I am far from a good Christian. One thing it taught me is that everyone is the same on the inside – kings and maids, white people and black people. So, no, I do not think white women are in fact soulless or anything like that – like how whites (particularly Anglos) used to think of savages.
I wrote a post on the hearts of white people. You should read it. You can type “the hearts of white people” in Google or go straight there:
Thanks for your comment. It was good.
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Stal: At least for the purposes of this post, white just means white Americans. When I say “white” that is what I am thinking of nine times out of ten.
But more broadly I see Middle Easterners, most Latin Americans, Central Asians, Pakistanis and many people in India as white. However I think in English when people say “white” they almost always have the English-speaking sort in mind, especially those in North America, Britain and South Africa.
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Blanc2: thanks for the confirmation!
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When I say “White” I think of it as a mind state. Like when someone acts racists my friends and I always say “That was so white of them.”
happens in offices all the time.
Always thinking ‘Why you got to be so white about it?’
White being more close minded.
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True, at bottom it is a state of mind.
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As to why there are not more black women with white men – I would have to agree with you to some extent. However, I grew up in Venice CA, where my high school was 70 percent hispanic (mexican, central american) and because of that, I always dated Latina girls.
The first girl I kissed was Claudia Lopez, who wore dark black lipstick, thick eyeliner, and hairsprayed up hair in front.
All my girlfriends till I went to college were latina. I think I went out with one “White” girl and she acted, well, white. I guess what you grow up around is more what you gravitate to, for the most part.
Interesting post though. I like how you just throw it out there.
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Thank you Abagond for affirming Black women.
Steph
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I agree w/ the post Abagond, but I just personally disagree with Middle Easteners, Central Asians, and South Asians being “white”. Nah. They sure are seen as distinct minorities (outside of their respective countries) and are NEVER treated as “white” in this part of the world. “White” is a shorthand for European lineage, none of which any of those ethnicities have. Sure, some Middle Easterners are classified as “Caucasian”, but that is from a different stock. Not Euro. Different features, bloodlines and the like.
South Asians, with the exception of Indo-Europeans, descend from the Dravididan people, which is related to Africa (like any ethnicity, really) many, many years removed.
And “Latino” …not a race. And most “Latinos” would NEVER classify as white except many Argentines, Chileans, Urguayans, and Paraguayans.
Just my piece. Good post though.
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Who is “white” is another post, but I know what you mean.
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I don’t like the eyes and look that sista is giving me. I see that on the street and next thing I know I’m walking into a damn pole. Which is worse when I’m with my friends and they just wait for me to walk into it. 😡
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I always found almond shaped eyes to be more attractive. But almond shaped eyes are found in most non-whites, it’s not only black women with almond eyes. I’ve seen some white American or European women with almond eyes and they were gorgeous.
It depends on how you interpret the different shaped eyes. Almond eyes especially on a black woman are intense, beautiful, and downright seductive.
But white women have very pretty eyes also. They are round, large, and bright. They seem happy and sweet. *Plus, they come in colors.*
I wouldn’t say that black women’s eyes are evil. And I wouldn’t say that white womens’ eyes are soulless. They are both beautiful in their own way, although I do prefer almond shaped eyes. Just a personal preference.
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Wow, very interesting comment! Some of it I am still thinking about.
Almond-shaped and seductive appeals to me way more than round, large and bright. Maybe that is what made me say that white women’s eyes seem like doll eyes.
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God bless all.
I must agree… because I feel the same way plus my hair stands up all over my body when I look at those eyes…It is the reality, if you’re real.
Peace
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Dark brown eyes are deep, soulful….. love it
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abagond I feel bad for your wife, you remind me of that bitter white man with that blog “white women suck” whose married to a woman of color (not black) but she’s mixed I believe, It’s like you’re with a black woman simply in spite of white women, why can’t you date or marry a black woman without comparing us to white women? white women are just as beautiful as any other race of women, why even when a white man likes BW he has to compare them to his own women? why can’t you just like the person and the race not be a factor at all?
It’s shameful so many BW are so damn stupid they can’t even see this. You are with a black woman in spite of a white woman, race played a factor in your marrying her and her race is probably the only reason you stick around, much like the guys with an asian fetish, sure it may take a few years to see such a fetish but it will come out soon enough.
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I hardly think that white women suck:
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i am a black women with those eyes your discussing from a youngster my dad would say where did you get those beautiful eyes from to this day men tell me i have beautiful(not the color) eyes well i finally met someone that i could say that about it was love at first sight for me anyway the moment my eyes met his i was smitten i just wish he felt the same his eyes are a lovely shade of brown but forget the color it’s the mystery that lays behind them and the depth of i don’t know what all i know is i could look in his eyes for a lifetime oh and as for white women maybe their eyes haven’t felt or seen what black women have that’s why it’s empty they have nothing to feel.
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Kimberly, I agree, I think part of the difference does go to what black women have felt and seen.
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I do hope you know that everything you have typed is simply refering to your taste in women, and nothing more significant. Your tone is so serious, but you are only talking about taste. Taste in physical beauty is something fickle, something that is influenced subconciously by many different factors in our lives, and–most of all–something superficial. Sorry, it has nothing to do with the soul.
If you look at most white people and have an initial reaction of looking at someone with no soul, then you should work hard to change that reaction within yourself–no matter how instinctual it is. I would be ashamed if I felt that way about anyone’s eyes.
What you said in ten paragraphs could have been said in one sentence: “I think black women have hotter eyes than white women.” I can’t find any more meaning in anything you wrote than that. Perhaps if you just said that, I would have thought you more childish, but I would have thought you a better person.
It appears to me that you place a lot of stock in looks, which is depressing to me. But I will admit it seems to be the norm.
–Lindsey.
PS: The end of Kimberly’s comment absolutely disgusts me.
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No, I said way more than that, but that was the part you could accept.
I am not saying white women do not have hearts or souls. I know they do:
And I know full well that women are more than just their looks:
But I am a man so a woman’s beauty has a certain effect on me. This is not the blog of a eunuch.
Maybe I do have certain hang-ups, like you said, but I honestly think there is more to it than just that. From what I can tell white women in the 1950s were not like this, so whatever it is, it goes beyond my own hang-ups.
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I cannot tell you our secret; it is something that most Black women are aware of
but only the ones who are Queens know how to use it.(Most of us)..I have been told that I look like I am high all the time,or I look like I can hypnotize someone with my eyes…..BS…..some guy trying to get some ….
That is why Black womens’ eyes are so powerful…..it is because we KNOW, instinctively. Dream on…..we loves you, and anyway……
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we loves you too.
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God I think it’s funny how you stumlbe on what you think about all the time.
I love color. don’t get me wrong every being on this earth is beautiful but I am more attracted to color women than White. Like the photo of the woman above on this site is absolutely perfect.
Black, Brown, Indian, Native American, Asian, Italian, Spanish, Egyptian,OH GOD just say someting sexy to me in another language and I’m puddy! and I tell you right now if I even walk down the street and I see someone with green or blue skin I will be the first to date you LOL just because your different.
I don’t care and the reason why I don’t care is because I’m sick and tired of people who do care. You know what screw how you feel and how you grew up in your family, your missin out big time. You know? You get older and you learn about the world and who is on it, that makes you feel good right?? open yourself up! I mean you will always win someone and lose someone. If your always I hate! blah blah blah! all the time well then that’s all you will ever have. sorry that’s the truth.
listen to this. My mother has this picture frame and on the box that it came in it says “it is estimated that there are 6,554,526,725 PEOPLE 193 countries + 6000 languages ON EARTH! but only 1 human race…share something BEAUTIFUL”…now if you can’t find someone who is right for you………
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God Bless everyone…
Black Women are just untouchable,it’s not even fair for other women and can’t be compared to any other…Other women front lkike they don’t know but women know within them that the sistas are just so perfect…Their default is at a higher level of beauty. In America, I know a lot of the sistas think of their self low…some don’t, but the reality is that they are at the top by far…Other women are very nice aswell but the truth will always hurt them other women…No offence to any other women…You are all beautiful.
I think the most beautiful women(dark complexion) can be from anywhere…
Peace
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I agree. All sorts of women are beautiful, but black women are a cut above in general.
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I’m sure she won’t sway you,
but I’ve always been felled by Claire Forlani
http://my-autographs.de/forlani.htm
Something else I thought you might find amusing is
http://www.morphthing.com
Its a pretty simple program, but sometimes the results are astounding.
m
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Yes, Claire Forlani is beautiful, but nothing can compare to morphthing! I love it!
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I think what youa re discussing is a cultural training.
You ever look at a black women and have her not look back? I know i havent…they are taught to be strong and proud. The black community is more social and interactive.
Now go to the white suburb where you dont even know your neighbors names. If you walk down the street you look away – not at someone.
White women are taught to not stare, not meat a persons gaze – its rude or uncomfortable to them.
I make a point when walking down the street to smile at everyone and to meet everyons gaze direclty in the eyes. Black people or Latin people and men (not women) from middle eastern countries will meet my gaze and smile back. White people (men and women) react uncomfortable to the intrusion of a stranger to their world. I dont know why white culture stopped being friendly – or when…but I find it disturbing that no one smiles and says hello when they walk down the street. It bothers me deeply.
Most people would say my eyes and smile are one of my best attributes – Warm and Real. Genuine…
I think what you are seeing as a lack of depth is because they are taught to guard themselves and jot engage in the eyes. Real feelings and emotions are hidden in the guise of being politie. They dont show anger, happiness or joy – its all about a polished slick yuppiness. I hate it and refuse to act that way.
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Excellent comment!
It also explains what I noticed about white women at the end of this post:
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Talked to my mom -she thinks this came about with the victorian era – In the “Wild West” you looked a person in the eye and were real and genuine.
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That could be because white women don’t have a history of struggles and hardships. Therefore, their eyes do not “tell a story” as some people phrase it.
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You can not say white women have not had struggles and hardships. Thats ridiculous. There is more to struggles and harships then those defined by the color of your skin. Not to negate those but. My scottish ancestors used to bury their women alive with their husbands when the husband died. They were property that was taken with the man. My grandmother was placed in an orphanage during the depression along with all her sisters becuase their father couldnt feed them. she was then adopted by a french women who was raped and brutilized by nazi soilders prior to escaping to the usa.
blue eyes lack depth – its a color issue. A pool of water, the deeper it goes the darker it gets. There for our minds convince use that blue eyes – which by their nature reflect light – are shallow and dark eyes – by their nature absorb light – are deep. Its a light trick that our mind associates with other things that it has seen and in no one has anything to do with the life experiences of the person…other than the cultural one I mention above (taugt to not look in the eyes etc).
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Davida, I like your comments above.
Very insightful and wide in perspective…
~
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these days most white actresses in Hollywood either have this empty look in their eyes
you did say Hollywood – maybe it’s the drugs that make the look that way?
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LOL. My GREAT grandmother was very old when I was born and I’m not sure if she even knew my name but she used to only call me “bright eyes” 🙂 People even now tell me that I have “happy eyes” and others have told me I have “bedroom eyes”, (not sure what that means exactly) it just seems like my eyes have always stood out to a lot of people my whole life! the other day I was talking to this guy at school and I looked at him and he was like “da*n!” lol. I think its funny, but I actually always hear people talking about black women’s eyes. Black women are very much looked over in society, people say BW are ugly and mean and this and that and act like we can’t have anything good about ourselves! I think we are a frustrated group to a certain extent and it shows more than other women in our eyes (my opinion) and because we have never really had much of a voice that people don’t take as b***h.
BUT I think this might be the reason, even though many white people jumped aboard to say white women are this or that what you said was racist (even though they prob wouldn’t care if someone turned it and said BW were ‘soulless’) I DO think it is because white women are expected to look ‘good’ and are held to a completely superficial standard, therefore for many of them their beauty can completely lack any real depth, it can only come as far as blonde hair and blue eyes and nothing more. They are ‘trophies’ to a lot of men, they are not poets. In all their history it was more how they looked than who they are as people….. I also grew up in Newport Beach Cali around a bunch of completely cold hearted white women, and many are that way. sorry 🙂
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I agree: their beauty seems to lack depth – in general.
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“That could be because white women don’t have a history of struggles and hardships. Therefore, their eyes do not “tell a story” as some people phrase it.”
i am sorry but thats very wrong. a bit of an over top assumption. white women go through struggles too.
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“The Eyes Have Soul.” Don’t ya think?
Can you image this face in pain, joy, fear, but look at the eyes, the eye have soul?
“The smartest minds are facing you every day in the mirror!”
The eyes see, even if they don’t record it in to memory; the eyes have soul. This challenge, I propose for you, can take years, or it can be in a flash. It just takes your willingness to see into the soul of the eyes. Is that why so many people will not look you in the eyes, they don’t want to see their soul, and what it represents?
Here is what you could do, when you look in the mirror, next time.
Really look into your own eyes
Note how they appear to you
Do you really know what color they are?
How reflective are they to your soul?
Note the state of the pupils of your eyes at different stages
Here is another observation you can do:
Look into a baby’s eyes
Look at the ways their eyes reflect you
How do those eyes communicate back to you?
Observations on other ages of children:
Note the wonder in them
Can you see what they are thinking about?
Can you see what we do, as interactions with them, what changes it makes in their eyes?
Now, find another adult that will let you look into their eyes. This one may take some convincing on your part, to let them even see their eyes. Do those same observations from above, and see what differences or similarities there are. If people don’t want to hide what they are about, they will let you be the observer. If they want you to see that child they have in them, however, mischievous they are, look and learn. Your confidence, or lack of it, will tell if you can really see what that other person is about. How do others fake us out with the look they give us? Can you see through the exterior, into the eyes of the soul?
http://neotech.ning.com/profiles/blogs/the-eyes-have-soul
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Why can’t there be one positive post about Black women with out someone trying to discredit or disagree. If this where praising white/latina/asian, women i doubt half these people here would disagree.
Whenever a black women gets some praise someone always has to mention another race to discredit black women. I find that offensive, maybe im to sensitive but i really think about things in depth.
@abagond what is your obsession with white girls??? Does your black wife know about this.
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LOL. You are the first person who has ever said that about me – that I have an obsession with white girls. I think if you read more of my blog you will see how groundless that idea is.
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Perhaps I’m sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong, but MzMee, you’re way off base about abagond. He has clearly stated in many of his threads, he prefers BW.
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@leigh204
Please mind your own business. Unless you are a black women you will NEVER understand.
And don’t respond to any of my post NOR follow my posts on here. Thanks!!!!
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Leigh is allowed to comment on any post or comment she feels like, just as you are. Please do not tell my commenters what to do. This is my blog, not yours.
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I may not be a BW, but at least I TRY to understand, better yet, empathize with BW.
Another thing, I can say whatever and go wherever I please. Thanks!!!
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@ leigh204
You do not care about black women, nor do they need you to empathize with them. (Why do you think you need to empathize with them???????)
Thanks!!!!!
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@MzMee
You are a sh*tsturring troll! No cares about your opinions!
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@MzMee
What you just said was unfair at the least. You don’t know her story and to whom she is close. You just come off as being really angry and bitter.
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Leigh’s insights and opionions on this blog have been quite appreciated. She is a welcome person on this blog MzMee. And also, what makes you think this is a “black blog”? Do you know for sure Abagond is black? What would your opinion of the blog be if you were to find out that Abagond was white? Would you leave to just read the other black blogs out there?
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@MzMee:
@ leigh204
You do not care about black women, nor do they need you to empathize with them. (Why do you think you need to empathize with them???????)
Thanks!!!!!
Wow, aren’t you grasping at straws? I guess you’ve taken it upon yourself to be the spokeperson for all BW, huh? Yes, I do care about BW, and I empathize with BW. What’s it to you? In fact, I empathize with all people of color. Why? Because I AM one. And I know what it’s like to have people be racist towards you.
Everyone has experienced some form of racism to varying degrees. This site is a great place for like-minded people to discuss their experiences and connect with others while learning something in the process. And if I choose to come to this site or any other site, it’s MY business not yours.
Gen Says:
@MzMee
What you just said was unfair at the least. You don’t know her story and to whom she is close. You just come off as being really angry and bitter.
AO Says:
Leigh’s insights and opionions on this blog have been quite appreciated. She is a welcome person on this blog MzMee. And also, what makes you think this is a “black blog”? Do you know for sure Abagond is black? What would your opinion of the blog be if you were to find out that Abagond was white? Would you leave to just read the other black blogs out there?
@Gen & AO:
Thank you ladies for your support. 😀
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@mzmee:
You don’t get it do you? Instead of fighting white supremacy, you choose to attack another racialized person. You are only playing into the hands of the powers that be. Most, if not all racialized people, have been subjected to racism in one form or another, some more than others. Hence, it is understandable that Leigh would have empathy for other racialized people. There is a racial hierarchy present in today’s society which is a causal effect of racism. The old ‘divide and conquer’ ploy is at work. Sure, everyone’s experiences are different but there is a commonality amongst racialized people when being subjected to racism and all its’ ensuing evil. Instead of fighting among ourelves, we should be banding together to alleviate the adverse effects of racism. That old saying”There’s safety in numbers” is true. Leigh is a kind heated and respectful person and does not warrant the remarks you have offered her.
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@Herneith, leigh204, Gen & AO
Forget MzMee she or he is a troll. Nothing more!
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Some people do come here with the worst of motives and bash blacks, but Leigh is hardly one of them.
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@Herneith, Vindicator, and abagond:
Aww, you guys are awesome! 😀
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My eyes were instantly drawn to the darker skinned lady with the cat eyes. Amazing!
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Gosh this is real romantic. Lol
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I think this could be a) your preference, b) eye colour or c) cultural thing.
If it’s a, thenit’s just you. If it’s b, then it’s still just you, but the reason is clear. Maybe you just dislike how most of blue or green eyes look like (I notice that most of your “empty eyed whites” examples have blue or green eyes).
If it’s c, then isn’t just you. When I say “cultural thing” I don’t mean on your culture, I mean on theirs. There is something in their life (the way the were raised, perhaps?) that taught them to be “nice and smile”. You can force yourself to smile; well, you can, but it always look fake. Maybe they were told to always maintain some “perfect” image. In other words, to be fake. If you’re pretending all the time, it reflects in your eyes.
“Do white men still fall in love that way?”
I don’t know if anyone falls in love that way, but I can think of an example. 🙂
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Sometimes it comes from what’s expected. There are tons of smart women both black and white. Being part Italian and usually viewed as “white” I can say that in my experience many, many white guys are just looking for a shell. Just a tall blond girl to be silent on his arm and be in his bed. It seems he’s afraid of smart funny women!
I know this is a generalization, but it’s tiring to be told how pretty, sweet, funny, and smart you are but men be afraid of you/to talk to you.
A couple must have chemistry but I don’t expect perfection. Not rich, but self supporting. Not a gym rat, but healthy and mobile!
But see, even the olive Mediterranean look is far below their standard of perfection. The bright eyed and bright minded look is intimidating to white guys. Hollywood just reflects that. Or maybe it causes it.
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I think you are generalising too much with your “black women have a deep mesmerising gaze and white women have the soulless gaze”. Maybe you just want something “exotic”, something not “normal” in your area so you prefer darker women, vice versa if you’re from Africa and you get the hots for lighter women.
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Well, this white boy certainly prefers dark eyes over light, but I wouldn’t go so far as to claim that light eyes are “soulless”.
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I doubt it has to do with the colour of the eyes. Elizabeth Taylor, for example, has light eyes that were hardly soulless – though I do see how dark eyes can seem deeper, all other things being equal.
I also doubt it has to do with exoticness either: I do not live in Africa but for most of my life I have lived in places where most women were black.
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Sorry, I never look at the eyes because they tell nothing. I look at the face because emotions are expressed in a persons features. The concept of telling who a person is by looking into their eyes is romantic drivel more than face, even if some of us have fooled ourselves into believing the nonsense.
As far as black women are concerned, I think they are just flat out sexier than whites because of their skin, their hips and thighs and their features. It was a whole different feeling when I made love to a black girl than a white. They smell different (better) than whites and feel better to the touch. They’re also tighter than white girls who usually don’t have the same internal muscle tone that black girls have.
Let’s face it. I think these black guys who chase after anything blonde are nuts, but their insanity gave me an opportunity for some of the best sex I’ve ever had. Maybe I’m just prejudiced, or perhaps I was black in a past life.
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hi my name is clark i have a girlfriend from spain and we know each other for 5 years and she is white and spanish and she loves me to death and she cant get her hand off me and she have a black woman body and she dont have pale skin her skin is like red bone type and she is beautiful and she speaks spanish and english and she have gorgeous cameleon eyes it change depends on her mood sometimes it gray, green,blue,hazel brown and it does run deep i get lost in them
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rihanna has this amazing, deep, hypnotic eyes! especially in her early videos.. just stunning
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Elizabeth Key Grinstead is the first black woman to get married in the New World, William Grinstead. Her descendants from them are Johnny Depp, Krista Allen, and Laurence Herman “Gus” Versluis.
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faye dunaway is a white woman with deep eyes (although she may have black heritage for all we know):
http://www.theswellelife.com/.a/6a00e54ef168098833010536c6f539970b-800wi
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well it’s not all about eyes, it’s about face, body, attitude etc
but being someone with many africans friends, i think i can say that black women aren’t attractive at all(africans).(for me at least)
and why u’re talking about white/black? where’s asians?
im thinking that asians are more and over attractive than some black women.
Not being racist at all, but until now i didn’t see an attractive black women in the world except for one and the only one Alicia Keys(well she’s brownish, idk if it counts or not lol)
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@ me
His post is about the eyes of black women. And he likes looking at black women for the same reasons you don’t.
You pull out the “I have the blackest of the black friends” card and claim you’re not racist but then throw out a dismissing blanket statement saying black African women are not attractive at all. I’m not surprised you went on to ask why “the look” you like isn’t included, lol get real.
—————-
You hear that Abagond, stop making posts about black women’s beauty and start making “all inclusive” posts, in the fashion of every beauty/fashion mag and ever so far reaching Hollywood movies.
/sarcasm off
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I don’t know what abagond does to attract the trolls, but he sure reels them in by the dozens.
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This site is highly biased. I was actually surfing the net to find why black people’s eyes look soul-less and stumbled upon this site. When I saw the two pictures at the top, black and white, I could see deep, rich soul in the white woman and an empty dark void in the black woman’s eyes. Imagine my surprise when I read the actual article!
This just goes to show that I guess we all see things differently.
I also disagree with the post that states how black women are more moral than white women. Statistics show that balck women cheat more, have more STDs and are more likely to commit crimes than white women. In my community alone I know dozens of very moral christian white women – it is the black women usually that try to scam stores and restaurants wherever they go – and forget about sexual morality! I don’t know a single black women that has married as a virgin, but I know plenty of white women who have and still do!
What a wierd site….
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Just responding to Meg…Many African American women are raised to follow strict Christian principles. Righteousness and truth is all we have to fight the injustices of a racist society. Also, I highly doubt your statistics on all three of those specific topics. It is a proven fact that middle aged white women are the usual culprits of petty theft crimes in department stores. Finally, just because YOU don’t know a single black woman that married as a virgin doesn’t mean their aren’t any. My sister who is an African American woman of the highest moral fiber, was a virgin when she married at the age of 18. She has been happily married for 27 years. Get over yourself…..
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Shoplifting:
Most people arrested for shoplifting in America are white – about 70% according to the FBI. And that comes in the teeth of racial profiling aimed at blacks and Latinos. According to one study shoplifters are most commonly white women in their twenties and early thirties.
Black female virginity:
According to American government numbers, a higher % of black females under 18 are virgins than white females.
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@Meg
You can see “soul” in someone’s eyes?
Time to lay off the ‘Tussin, Meg. Seriously.
I don’t know a single black women that has married as a virgin, but I know plenty of white women who have and still do!
Newsflash! White women lie about their sex lives more than black women!
@Ali
Just responding to Meg…Many African American women are raised to follow strict Christian principles. Righteousness and truth is all we have to fight the injustices of a racist society.
O rly? What “righteousness” and “truth” is that, exactly? That gays are less than human? That virgin women are somehow more sacred than non-virgin women?
I can’t believe what I’m seeing: two grown and presumably adult women, presumably compos mentis, arguing that virginity somehow confers “high moral fiber” on a woman.
Hello, ladies! Welcome to the 21st century!
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@Thaddeus
I was thinking the same thing Thaddeus about the virgin thing. As far as saying gays are less than human I’ve never heard that taught in church.
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i’m a light-skin b/woman my eyes are dark and big but shaped nice in my head. i perfer the same type of persons to. light-skin, big dark eyes,of course straight or curly hair natural. the only woman w/all these good things is ms. denise mathews aka vanity. from vanity 6 now she’s a preacher it’s all good.
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Everyone has a preference, and that is not racist; but to say that you like looking into a black woman’s eye’s more than a white woman “because they have more soul,” is racist. The feelings you have and the reason you feel the need to look away is because it is lust(yes, you do not need to look at a woman body or consciously think about sex for it to be lust). Black woman have differently shaped eyes and eyebrows because of genetics, and make-up helps a lot too, it has nothing to do with having more soul than white women (who also generally have lighter color eyes), and to be dismissive of white women because of your preference, is racist. “white men falling in love with white women when their eyes meet” I don’t think they refer to themselves as “white” men, they might be, but I don’t think a point is made out of race, and love at first sight or eye-lock? That doesn’t exist, it is only a manner of speech to describe an initial feeling, no one ever falls in love from seeing a person, it takes time. By the way, comparing one woman who you find as equally unattractive as the person you find attractive isn’t really a good and un-biased comparison, is it?
I also want to say that I am “white,” and my preference is “black” women (and it is because of their features such as eye color/shape, eyebrows, lips, curves, and skin), but I do not denigrate white women or the features of white woman to justify my preference in black women. Being white I also know that I have just as much soul as a black person and to say that I have no soul, or at least “less soul,” because I “don’t have it in the eyes” is insulting.
Does this mean that blind people have no soul??? Something for you to think about.
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@stalherz
“When I say “White” I think of it as a mind state. Like when someone acts racists my friends and I always say “That was so white of them.”
happens in offices all the time.
Always thinking ‘Why you got to be so white about it?’
White being more close minded.”
When you and your friends say that you are also being racist, it is the same as saying “That’s so black,” and relating it to negative feelings/ideas/way of thinking. You are dismissing or ignoring the positives of a race, so you can generalize them and raise yourself above. White is WHAT I am, not WHO I am, and like many Africans(not just Africans/Blacks, but for the purpose of example), we come in many shapes, sizes, and have many different ideals, religions, philosophies, music tastes, embrace different cultures, so it is not possible to define “White” as being one thing.
See, when I saw that you said you only had one girlfriend who was white, that showed me that you are probably generally biased towards white people, and things that are white. You even say “she acted white,”(generalizing all of us) and again it shows how you seem to have a dislike of the white race from spending time with other “colored” races and “less white”. You chose to not see white or “European” (don’t know how the hell a person can associate White with being European, we’re not all in Europe, maybe descended of) as being different(again your generalizing about white and black people everywhere, as we all share each other’s culture[you might not want to admit that]), instead you choose to see us as “less than.” This is what I see.
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I’m white and for the most part I agree with you on what you’ve just said, just looking at the pictures at the top of the page, the black woman has way more “substance” in her eyes than Lindsay Lohan.
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“Sometimes when I look into the eyes of a black woman and she looks back something inside me melts.”
“With black women it is like their eyes go all the way down to their souls, down to their hearts.”
Her eyes reflect the divinity that she is and are a wonderful reminder of the divinity we all are.
I can feel the electricity, aliveness, and juiciness of her being in her energetic presence. She represents a profound gift to humanity.
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I would agree with Abagond about there being a difference between the eyes of white women (US) and black women (US).
With Black Women there is a much greater degree of intimacy, I guess you could call it.
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Hi, I stumbled across this post in my break time while idly Google-surfing 🙂 I hardly ever leave comments but the subject matter and the interesting comments were hard to not respond to.
I’m a Black British woman (yeah, we exist- although from the UK media you wouldn’t think we do- but that’s another subject) and I wanted to throw in my “two cents” worth as you guys would put it. Actually over here we’d class people like the Spanish and Portuguese as white just as the French, English, Italian, Germans etc are white. By “we”, I mean pretty much everyone in Europe would agree with these classifications.
It seems strange that you would class them as anything else. Granted, the Spanish and Portuguese may look less “traditionally” white than say French, but for whatever reason this doesn’t change the fact that they’re still widely referred to as white.
Also as to calling the Indians, Arabs and Middle Easterns white? Again, in Europe they would categorically not be classed as white. The reason for this, I think is mainly due to the bigger cultural and religious differences between these regions and Europe. Even though some Middle Easterns, arguably are paler skinned or appear “more white” than the Spanish, Portuguese or other European nations.
Just food for thought. It seems there’s a big difference between how the US and Europe (the UK at least) perceives race and colour.
Anyway, as a definitely “Black” British (not African-American) woman – would you also count my eyes as being soulful? I hope so 😉
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@Rita
Snap 🙂
Hi there. I know Spanish are more often than not classed as white in the UK but, I dont necessarily agree. In fact, a couple of the recent posts on here show the Spanish link to Moors who are definately NOT white.
This post, references it here but im sure there must be more stuff out there https://abagond.wordpress.com/2012/02/24/racist-white-teen-girls-goes-on-a-rant-about-blacks/#comment-115004
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in bed. my african wife looks into my blue eyes, and i look into her brown!
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I am a white (or at least with white features like green eyes, pale skin, etc) and your feeling when looking into those black eyes is exactly what I feel here in Iran when I look at the deep black eyes of my country’s girls. Though most of Iranians are brunette but sometimes fully white features could be seen among them.
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Goodday!
I am a b/w and although I agree with the blogger!
But white women have beautiful deep brown eyes too, so it could therefore boil down to brown eyes being the main issue here and not race!!!
With regard to some of the negative comments, I feel that these are mainly from people who have (like mentioned earlier on) felt slighly uneasy or threatened by the fact that the media proclaimed supreme (white) standard of beauty has been threatened on a thread.. lol yep, a mere thread. But tough! So what!! that’s life… and it’s the opinion of the author who has every right to air it.
I bid you all I fine farewell x
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I like this post. I like this post because it shows me as a Black woman that there are Black men like Abagond that love Black woman’s features.
Yes, I do agree with Abagond on White and Black women’s eyes….mostly.
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Dear Abagond,
You are a racist. Period.
Bye
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“Racist?” Pretty harsh. Biased? Most definitely.
Just look at the pictures you chose to present your argument. One woman is looking right into the bloody camera, whereas the other one is looking off into the distance. You post these pictures to bolster your opinion, saying one is deep and penetrating while the other is vapid and forgettable? That’s like saying western cuisine is better than eastern, by showing a picture of a filet mignon with all the trimmings against a picture of Top Ramen. :p
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@ Ajax
I put up those pictures to illustrate my point not to prove it. If I reversed it so that the black woman had the vacant look it would have confused the reader.
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It’s not wrong to feel how you feel, but honestly I think you are stereotyping. It isn’t a coincidence to me that you chose to use vapid and uneducated starlets as your examples for the examples of “soulless” eyes, it’s a pretty widespread stereotype that white starlets are vapid and insipid. And also that white people in general are “square”, boring “crackers”. It’s also another stereotype that black people are more interesting for their more “colorful” backgrounds, and “urban” lifestyle, even the whole idea of the fact that black women have a more apparent “soul” is kind of stereotypical, if you think about the racial connotations of the word soul. Honestly I think you were brought up with a more than healthy bag of stereotypes and you are projecting these on to how you feel about and perceive of people.
I don’t blame you for how you feel or expressing how you feel, but really the diction you chose to use led me to believe this way. For those who might claim I left a negative comment because I firmly believe in the idea of white media supremacy, you are wrong, I am asian. I don’t really benefit from this system either.
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The image you’ve chosen of a white woman, not even looking directly into the camera is an unfair portrayal of white women’s “gazes” immediately from the outset (I am a black woman, not lesbian, just desirous of fairness in arguments). Calling a white woman’s eyes “soulless” and implicating that they are somewhat vacant is incredibly unfair and hurtful. It seems to me that what you’re trying to say-racial stereotypes removed-is that you have a preference for almond-shaped eyes which BOTH white (Elizabeth Taylor, Audrey Taylor) and black women have.
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The eyes are the windows to the soul.
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^ amen they sure are, I look at certain people’s eyes and the ones that have beady eyes are crazy lol. I look at some people’s eyes when they were young and sweet and compare it to how their eyes look when they aged and became crazy and their eyes look different, it’s something missing.
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Some people try to hide their emotions just for security. Who knows what’s going on behind the eyes that look soulless. They might want to cry or get angry but they have to protect themselves in public. However, when their emotions are out of control, then their eyes shows what’s going on in the soul. That’s like the same thing that happened with Princess Diana. She had haunting eyes in one of her interviews. Oh, and here are two white women that have eyes that speak. http://www.wookmark.com/image/113707/women-brunettes-brunettes-women-brown-eyes-faces-pale-skin-1920×1443-wallpaper-dark-wallpapers-free-desktop-wallpapers
inspiration.hello-brokeh.com/index.php?post/2009/08/03/Natalia-Vodianova-by-Paolo-Roversi
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Wow, this has got to be the worst blog post I’ve ever read. I didn’t even bother to click on the others (more white woman hate? Black woman fetishizing?).
First off: you can praise the beauty of black women without tearing down white women or anyone else. Saying you feel that white women’s eyes don’t have “soul” is not only ridiculous (and completely subjective), but extremely insulting. You have a personal preference for black women? Fine. Black women are beautiful. So write a blog post about how much you love them and their eyes without comparing them to anyone.
Secondly, you are not doing any favors to black women with this. This fetishizing (as another woman said above), pure and simple. Especially as a white man (as I assume you are). I would feel grossed out reading a post by a man of another race glorifying white women and tearing down black women (I would call it racist, first–for tearing down women of another race–misogynist, second–for believing his views of a woman’s looks somehow meant anything or were at all important to who they were as people–and creepy, third, for his racial fetish).
Third, as I said, this is sexist. Who the hell cares what you think? “My penis likes black women and is white women’s soulless eyes make it shrink.” Have you heard of the “male gaze?” You have basically just written a blog post celebrating a racialized version of it.
And in terms of white women not going through struggles…ha ha ha! Right. You do all realize we live in a patriarchy, right? That white women experience all kinds of sexism (in some countries worse than others), discrimination, domestic violence, and rape? Black women, who experience both racial and sex discrimination, have it worse; but of course it depends on individual circumstances, now doesn’t it? I’ve known plenty of sheltered middle-class black women and plenty of impoverished or otherwise disenfranchised white women. I don’t think vulnerability or victimhood within our culture gives “depth” either. I am not “deeper” because others discriminate against me and I have experienced violence. I am deeper for my strength of character, which could come regardless of my experiences, simply because I am a person who cares about others and has done lots of critical thinking on important issues. And people who are strong, whether it’s an inner strength or comes from the strength of family background, are people who are lucky, of any race.
If finding this laughable, repugnant blog post has taught me anything it’s that all women’s eyes are beautiful, and it’s not men’s opinions that make them that way.
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I didn’t find this post offensive in the least. Unbashed Calabash should have taken the time to read through the comments before loosing his mind lol
I don’t think people have a soul but I do think people have human spirit and that the eyes are a mirror of that.
Beauty is subjective and we see what we want to see.
Before I met my wife I thought all races attractive. Now I find I have developed a preference. All races are still attractive it just that my eyes go to what I think is most beautiful now.
The most beautiful eyes are the ones that smile back.
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I find black and white women have slightly different context or something both can let you know what they’re thinking without a word however
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@ unabashed calabash
When it comes to female beauty I am racist. It is nearly impossible to live in the US with its racialized beauty standards and not be. But, if anything, that racism favours White women way more than it should:
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I hate looking men in the eyes because when i do i feel like i draw them closer to me its like i know what there thinking but camt help myself lol
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This is pretty racist. I’m a white woman who loves painting people of all colors, of all ethnicities. I stumbled upon this while I was looking for the perfect eyes to use as a reference in order to finish my painting of an African American woman. I’ve got to say that this is one of the most racist random things I’ve come across. To say that an entire group of people has souless eyes based upon their skin color…that’s horrific. That sounds like a precursor to genocide. You should be ashamed of yourself. Whether you’re talking about blacks, whites, Asians, ect. makes no difference. Racism is racism and tolerating it perpetuates it for ALL people. You should be quite ashamed of yourself.
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Would you like a few mea culpas?
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Forgot I had this hidden away among my bookmarks. Funny thing is I stumbled upon this years ago when looking up why black eyes look soulless.
What you are perceiving is the fact that black people have naturally thicker eyes and thicker skin. White people have thinner eyes that are more sensitive to UV rays.
What I perceived back then, on the other hand, was most likely the fact the high rate of drugs and lack of a strong moral foundation or educational background among today’s black community in general.
That and physically black people move their eyes less often – typically when someone is thinking, their eyes shift around. That still gaze the author perceives as ‘deep’, I perceived as lack of thought.
All a matter of perception.
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Joriko
I will address your pseudoscience in full later but
“African Americans were found to have thinner central cornea thickness measurements than Caucasians. This finding in African Americans may lead to lower applanation intraocular pressure readings compared with those of Caucasians, potentially resulting in an underestimation of the actual level of intraocular pressure.”
such study deals with glaucoma and not a lack of movement of eyes which has no correlation with brain activity.
jamanetwork.com/journals/jamaophthalmology/fullarticle/264897
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“White people have thinner eyes that are more sensitive to UV rays.”
Funny, I’ve always been told the sensitivity has to do with low melanin.
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@ Abagond
“In old books you read about white men falling in love with white women when their eyes meet: time stands still and all that. That is the sort of thing I am talking about. Do white men still fall in love that way?”
I have.
@ Joriko
“All a matter of perception.”
Indeed. The answers you sought were in the eyes of the beholder.
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It’s natural to look for a response in a woman’s eyes so that it would be given in an understandable and readible form. White women with light irides are said to be more popular [with white men?] because of that visible reaction of their pupils. The problem is that most men believe their state of mind depends on that female reaction and attitude, which is false. I used to believe in that, too, but it’s more about instincts than about a nature of love.
I haven’t looked into black women’s eyes long enough to notice such a reaction, and, judging by rection of black girls in the city where I am now, they wouldn’t encourage my further interest. My future fourth wife would not appreciate any form of my further interest towards them, either 🙂
But usually it’s not a feeling or a physical appearance but rather a woman’s energy I’m drawn to, and it could be different. A woman with a good energy is hard to find, and a woman with an energy of death or poverty could bring the predictable result if no precautions would be taken.
Yet, I believe that a woman with a good energy would not make a man’s mind knotted and tangled. What most human beings think to be a love is just a passion, an interest, a longing or a lust in their grosser or subtler forms.
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“I’ve always been told the sensitivity has to do with low melanin”
Precisely.
“lack of movement of eyes… which has no correlation with brain activity.”
http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0963721412436810
Don’t act coy. This is universally observable. When people are in deep thought or sifting through memory, you typically see them lower their gaze, look down, shift their eyes side to side, etc.
@Open Minded Observer
Indeed. Unlike the author, I’m not making claims like “The eyes of white women have grown cold of any true feeling”, just pointing out that this is what I perceived back then when I looked that up.
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Joriko,
I don’t do coy. The eye movement or NLP was a theory of the 1970’s that was debunked because scientific research found that A) not everyone follows the standard rules to indicate thoughts or feelings through eye movement and B) when people think of recent events or even information they are familiar with they may not move their eyes at all.
https://nlp-now.co.uk/nlp-eye-movement-clues/
While your article is great please take the time to read it in full and not the abstract. The abstract speaks on what is to be discussed and can be misleading. The article basically discusses the 1970’s belief and study behind the subject at length. While the author did conduct research it was not definitive in the slightest. There is a conclusion the individual is thinking, but none of the research presented in the article indicates how that conclusion was drawn other than presenting tasks and noticing eye moment.
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Joriko,
As to your black skin comment.
In comparison with white skin, the black skin stratum corneum is equal in thickness but more compact: about twenty cell layers are observed in blacks versus sixteen layers in whites.*
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1485761
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2016/04/04/do-blacks-feel-less-pain-than-whites-their-doctors-may-think-so/?utm_term=.e007cb3c56ea
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@ Joriko
“Precisely.”
Melanin does not determine the thickness of skin, only the color.
Skin thickness varies depending on where on the body it is located. The skin surrounding the eye is the thinnest, while the skin of the palm of the hand is the thickest.
Please note that the thickest skin on the palm of the hand is lighter in color than the skin elsewhere on the body.
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One more source regarding the alleged eye movement and thinking.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3394779/
Goodnight.
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I accept your thesis that it doesn’t apply in all cases, but I did say “typically”
Most people shift their eyes away from their conversation partner when they are rummaging through the memory bank, at the very least.
I was wrong about the thickness. I know that black skin is thicker and figured that would apply to the eyes as well. Perhaps the compactness you referenced is the reason for this misperception.
In any case, the motive of my comment was only to illustrate that the author of this article was blinded by their own perception – since I initially stumbled upon this years ago because I perceived the exact opposite.
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@Joriko
I understand you said “typically” but I also gather that you failed to read all sources presented including yours. The article never said most people shift their eyes. In fact one specifically said many people do and many people don’t. If a large number of people can or can not engage in eye movement then it is not a typical matter so much as a wild card or other characteristics of that individual.
You are also wrong about black skin being thicker. It is no more thicker than white skin and a link above states as such. The author made it quite clear it was his opinion. You attempted to us pseudoscience to counter. Big difference.
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I’ll take you for your word on the thickness of the skin – I do not specialize in a scientific field; I’ve often read articles referring to the ‘thickness’ of melanin in black skin and I’ve seen it said on multiple occasions that Africans have thicker skin in general.
Mix of bad information and misinterpretation, I guess.
You are nitpicking about the eye movement, though. It is self-evidently the norm that when people think they generally move their eyes more.
Your last comment seems to imply motivations into my comment that weren’t there – the author may have been expressing a strong opinion (verging more on prejudice), I was not.
The ‘big difference’ is that the biological elements I mentioned (erroneous though they may be) were not used to reinforce an opinion on my part. It was simply an attempt to explain the why in regards to the focal point that the author was victim to their own perception.
My apologies if I offended you.
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@Joriko
“It is self-evidently the norm that when people think they generally move their eyes more.”—There have been three articles presented and neither of them appear to fully support that. At least two clarify why NLP is unreliable in nature and that it isn’t norm as many do and many don’t.
“My apologies if I offended you.”–Offended? No. Straightforward? Yes.
“Your last comment seems to imply motivations into my comment that weren’t there “–Not really. You did present pseudoscience. What you stated is common belief among white supremacist (not saying you are) that was falsely passed around to indicated blacks were inferior. It was believed to be true because it was slapped with the label of science, but it was entirely false as future studies have shown. Regardless you used it as a counter to authors perception no?
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How can I meet her I would like her to be my friend I am married.
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Divorce your wife first. You can then meet all the single women you want.
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Honestly, there is no real information in this.
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Lovely blog! I am loving it!! Will come back again. I am taking your feeds also.
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Wow at first I thought this writing was a bit offensive but when I finished it I thought there was something to it. Beautiful prose.
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LOOOL ain’t no way bro is wilding wtf
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