And, if I had any doubts, the Implicit Association Test for racism shows it: I am not an extreme racist, but I do unthinkingly favour blacks over whites. It is easier for me to think good things about blacks and bad things about whites than the other way round.
Some commenters call me a racist like it proves something. In most cases it proves nothing because it is just an ad hominem argument: that my argument must be bad because I am a bad person. But bad people can make good arguments and good people can make bad arguments. Arguments should stand or fall on their own, not on who makes them.
My racism is not particularly worse or better than that of most Americans. But two things make it different: First, it goes in the opposite direction from that of most Americans – it favours blacks, not whites; it is a black racism, not a white racism. Second, I am honest about being racist.
One time I was called up for jury duty. The court told us a 20-year-old Hispanic man was accused of robbing a store at gunpoint. I was asked if his race would affect my judgement. I said yes. I expected half of the other people to say yes too, especially since it would help to get them out of the jury. Only one other person did!
If racism were that rare we would be living in a completely different society. That proved to me that most people in America fool themselves into thinking they are not racist.
Lying to ourselves and not talking about it only helps to keep race relations stuck in 1974.
I do not hate white people in general, though some things they do or allow to go on does make my blood boil. I am on my guard with them because I know that their interests are not always my interests, that their experiences and ways of thinking are different than mine. And, because some of them have made it clear what they think of me, I wonder if others think that way too but are just better at hiding it.
That said, I do think that blacks and whites are born with the same hearts and the same minds. They are both the children of Eve, whether biblical or mitochondrial. Most of the differences between blacks and whites in America are the creation of history and society, not of inborn qualities. “White” and “black” are not so much physical races but castes made up to suit the interest of slaveowners. The slaves were freed long ago but the castes go on because it suits whites, because, deep down, most whites do not care about black lives.