Trans-attracted men, also known as transoriented men or, as a put-down, tranny chasers, are men whose strongest attraction is to transgender women – women who were born as boys but see themselves as women. They are mostly attracted to those that look like a woman but still have a penis. To them that is not “ew”, but “the best of both worlds”. Others see it as a fetish, sexual perversion or form of closeted homosexuality.
Because of transphobic shame most men who feel the attraction keep it a secret.
The paradox is that while we know many men feel the attraction – the market for transgender porn and trans female sex workers leaves little doubt of that – the shame keeps many transgender women and the trans-attracted men who would love them in the closet. Fearing loneliness and wanting a love life, they try to carry on as cisgendered women and straight men. Such relationships have not enjoyed the huge gains in acceptance in the West made by gay and lesbian relationships since the 1990s.
Trans-attracted men are little studied but this much seems to be true:
- Only 10% consider themselves gay, and even those see it as a different kind of gay. Most consider themselves straight or bisexual or something without a name.
- They rarely become gay – that is, have relationships with homosexual cisgender men.
- Some do want to become transgender themselves or cross-dress, but it is not common.
- Their numbers are growing due to transgender pornography on the Internet.
- Most experience trans women through pornography and sex workers, like the ladyboys of Thailand. Some of these men are just in it for the kicks but about half would probably consider a serious relationship.
- Few have had a serious relationship with a transgender woman.
- Some who have experience move from more womanly looking transgender women to those in a less changed femboy state.
- Only 5% to 10% go for those who have had a sex change operation.
- Their preference for trans women tends to grow over time and rarely reverts back to a preference for cis women.
- Between 30% and 50% do not need to be topped as part of the relationship; about 20% prefer it.
- Most keep their attraction a secret.
They are not gay: ordinary gay men are not attracted to trans women, while plenty of straight men are.
Some say most straight men are attracted to trans women, but transphobic shame keeps them in denial. Others say only about 5% are, that they seem to be part of a trans spectrum, with some becoming trans women themselves.
There are successful relationships between trans-attracted men and transgender women, but they are little known to the public at large.
The Internet is a blessing and a curse: On the one hand pornography presents trans women as sex objects, not as women to love and treasure. On the other hand, it has made more men than ever know of their attraction and, in the long run, will provide a way for them to find their other half.
– Abagond, 2013, 2016.
- trans women
- Janet Mock – trans woman
- Poll: Would you date this woman?