The following is based on Dr Beverly Tatum’s excellent book, “Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?” (1997):
Asian Americans are not all alike. Asians came to America from different countries at different times for different reasons. Some grew up in America, some grew up overseas. Some live in poverty, some do quite well, though not quite as well as many imagine – they still make less money than whites with the same education.
Despite all that they have certain common experiences of racism from living in America because they are seen as being alike. And that affects how those who were born in America grow up.
Overall it is like growing up black, going through roughly the same stages:
- race does not matter
- experience of racism
- making sense of your race or ethnicity
- becoming proud of your race or ethnicity and moving forward with a secure sense of who you are
Unlike blacks, however, some Asian Americans can fool themselves into thinking of themselves as honorary whites, as raceless in a sense – like Tiger Woods, in fact, who is half Asian. So it might not be till their late 20s that they go through all these stages.
The danger of not coming to terms with being Asian in America is that it leads to self-hatred and insecurity. If you do not have your own image of being Asian, you will have the white image of what that means, stereotypes and all. That is bad: Whites, in the end, look down on Asians. They do not see them as fully human. That is what the racism is about.
Asians are affected by two main racist stereotypes:
- model minority: Asians as quiet, hard-working, putting their families first and being good at math and science.
- perpetual foreigner: Asians as not truly American even if they grew up in America. Because they “look Asian” they do not “seem American”.
Asian Americans often grow up in white neighbourhoods and become completely White American by culture – in how they talk and act and think – but still they are not fully accepted by whites because of how they look.
Some might wonder what is wrong with being a model minority. It is a good thing, right? No:
- Like any stereotype, it is extremely insulting: it refuses to see a person as an individual. If you work hard and get good grades, for example, it is “because you are Asian”.
- It gives whites an excuse not to take Asians seriously when they complain of racism.
- It is not even true: most Cambodian Americans, for example, never complete high school!
- It puts Asians at odds with blacks and Latinos when both should make common cause against white racism.
Asians are seen as these limited, cardboard beings. That comes across, for example, in the limited way they are shown in Hollywood and comic books. To become fully Asian American you have to overcome the white ideas of what that means.
See also:
[...] the Chinese as well. His rhetoric is simple and easy to understand. He should run for office. growing up Asian American – abagond.wordpress.com 08/21/2009 The following is based on Dr Beverly Tatum’s excellent [...]
Way off on this one. My wife is Asian and gets the stereotypes from everyone, not just the whites.
@Christopher
Yeah, my ex-boyfriend is Asian and he received the same from everyone. When we were out, black men would make “kung fu” noises and tell him to leave their sister alone (me).
And white men would ask what I am doing with him.
He didn’t identifiy with the white race.
Excellent post.
I’m not East Asian but I grew up with many and used to browse many Asian American forums. This sums up how they felt about being “yellow” in the U.S.
Islandgirl,
I think it’s weird that some black guys openly disapproved of you being with an Asian fellow. How dare they! LOL. How many years have black women had to see them FLAUNT their (usually unattractive) non-black women! The nerve. LOL.
Black female/Asian male combos are super rare in the western world.
But again, great post, Aba.
Thanks, Mynameismyname.
@ islandgirl & Christopher Herz:
I know that black-on-yellow racism can be particular mean, to say the least, and there are reasons for that (I hope to do a post on it in time), but for anyone growing up in America white racism is what matters the most in the end because whites have the most power in society by far.
I’m Asian-Canadian of Filipino descent and the part about model minority is something I was expected to live up to. For example, I suck at Math. I had classmates in school copy my answers because they perceived I was very good with numbers. Wrong! Imagine their surprise when they discovered they did just as poorly as I did. That’ll teach them for copying me. LOL!
Regarding the perpetual foreigner, I know some Asians whose families have lived in Canada for over a hundred years…at least, four or five generations, and they’re still looked upon as strangers.
Another thing. Although I was born in Canada, and have no accent whatsoever, I always receive, “You speak English well. What country did you originate from?” despite the fact I was born there.
I have been guilty of that: I once asked an old Asian man in New York waiting for a bus if the bus was headed to where I was going. I asked him slowly and probably a bit too loudly, thinking his English was not all that good. Imagine my embarrassment when he answered me in perfect English!
^ I’ve experienced that as well. I’ve said, “I heard you loud and clear. I’m not deaf, you know.” LOL!
I was reading some more again about the Vietnam War – many American GI(s) when on leave would go to Australia or a country with “no Asians” instead of the many Asian countries near Vietnam because they couldn’t handle “seeing all those slant eyes” – not all Asians are Vietnamese but yet to these GI they were all the “same”. That is RACIST!
Some Asians may not have dark skin but that does not free them from experiences of very extreme and nasty racism.
Wow.
@Therese:
Before the Vietnam war, there was the little known Philippine-American war (1899-1902). As I mentioned previously, I am of Filipino descent. My mother made me aware of my people’s history and struggles. She mentioned African-American soldiers were conflicted that they had to fight in a war against their “little brown brothers” as Filipinos were called back then and a lot worse, mind you. Here’s an excerpt from a journal article titled
“African-American soldiers and Filipinos: racial imperialism, Jim Crow and social relations” by Scot Ngozi-Brown.
In February 1899, the Spanish Government ratified a peace treaty which “entrusted” the Philippines to the United States. Despite the success in the war with Spain, the United States military forces could not avoid conflict with another opponent in the Philippines. Emilio Aguinaldo had led a well-organized Filipino resistance to Spanish colonialism prior to the United States’ intervention, and this resistance continued after the Spanish defeat. When the peace treaty was ratified, skirmishes between Filipino nationalists and United States forces had already occurred. These conflicts evolved into full-scale, pitched battles. The Filipinos also used guerrilla warfare tactics to resist what they considered an American replacement of Spain as the oppressor.
This turn of events in the early Spring, 1899, marks the beginning of the Philippine-American war (1899-1902) – a war which quickly involved the United States Army’s African-American soldiers. All four black regiments which had previously fought in Cuba were dispatched to the Philippines in the summer of 1899. These African-American soldiers were to find themselves placed in an extremely difficult situation. They were foot soldiers for a racist ideology in which white Americans characterized Filipinos as they did African-Americans: as inferior, inept, and even subhuman. When the United States military occupied the Philippine islands, it installed a racist society which alienated both Filipino and African-American soldiers.(1)
Here’s more info about the African-American soldiers in the Philippines-American war.
http://philcsc.wordpress.com/2009/06/27/african-american-soldiers-in-the-philippine-revolution/
I know that black-on-yellow racism can be particular mean, to say the least, and there are reasons for that (I hope to do a post on it in time), but for anyone growing up in America white racism is what matters the most in the end because whites have the most power in society by far.
I don’t know…
I’ve been wrestling with this idea for some time now and I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s counterproductive to think of racism from different races having a different “power.”
The idea that an African-American or Native American calling you a “Chink” is somehow different or less damaging than a White person calling you a “Chink” seems questionable logic at best.
^^
Good point.
However, black and Native Americans are also stigmatized, due to living in a white supremecist (sp) so them calling an East Asian a “chink” can be seen as the pot calling the kettle black.
Thank you so much for that information L.T. – I do try to read up on as much information as I can about colonial and civil wars in the South East Asian area (along with the rest of the world as much as I can) especially at the turn of last century.
King, great point, but I would still agree that Whites have more power. All races can use ethnic slurs, but Whites are the only group that has enough power to discriminate on a widescale, i.e., in employment, in housing, etc.
Sorry, I meant to include that the examples I mentioned are institutional racism, and in the US the “institution” is set up by a White power structure.
Right, blacks can be racist at a personal level but generally only whites have the power to do it at the institutional level: the police, courts, schools, employment, housing market, newspapers, fashion and film industry, etc. At the moment you are being called names that stuff does not matter, but over the space of your whole life it will matter more. Not that that ever makes it right to call someone a name.
L.T.:
Thanks for the information about black soldiers in the Philippines. It makes sense but I did not know about it.
@Therese & abagond:
You’re very welcome. This is a part of history that needs to come to light. We may come from different backgrounds, but we’re not so different after all. Racism affects all of us and we’re in this together.
>Black female/Asian male combos are super rare in the western world.
Why is this, btw?
Because according to American stereotypes Asian men are the least manly and black women the least womanly.
By that measure, though, black men and Asian women should be the likeliest interracial pairing, but it hardly is. Partly I think that is because black men are not all that attracted to Asian women, certainly no where nearly as much as white men seem to be.
White men are very much attracted to Asian women.
A lot has to do with pure attraction. To some, their looks are exotic.
I once had an Asian girlfriend who used to hate the way she looked i.e. her eyes. But I told her that’s what makes us all unique.
How boring it would be if we were all the same.
Many other white men see Asian women as being submissive. Which in my experience they are.
I certainly don’t want a woman who is overbearing to say the least. IMO, women should always be submissive with the man being the dominant figure in the household.
At least that’s the way I was raised anyway.
Submissiveness is good for me, I don’t want to feel like I’m dating a dude. I want her to be womanly like.
And I prefer the petite (5′5″) – (100-125 lbs.) and many other white males prefer that as well.
That’s just the physical aspect of it.
Personalities vary of course, but the ones I’ve known/dated, are very sweet, kind and submissive in their approach. Very family oriented.
White males when dating a different race tend to lean towards the skinny/petite/submissive type of women.
Of course that varies man to man, but I suppose that is only part of the reason white males prefer/date/marry Asian women when they step out of the box.
Just my opinions/experiences here. In no way does this reflect every white man nor am I trying to reflect upon every white man.
@Azrazyel:
Everytime I hear the word “exotic” I’m thinking, “Exotic compared to what?” Asians have eyes, nose, ears, etc. just like everyone else. What does the shape or shall I say the slant of our eyes determine how “exotic” we are? Btw, having slanted eyes is not exclusive to Asians.
I bet you the reason why your Asian girlfriend despised the way she looked is because she was made fun of for looking different. I can relate. Growing up, I was one of the few Asians around and I was mercilessly taunted simply for being Asian.
Regarding Asian women being submissive, I am one Asian woman who is definitely not. Ask my significant other, and he’ll tell you otherwise. lol! Asian women are no more or no less submissive than other women.
As for the physical aspect, many Asian women are indeed petite in height, and are quite slim. I really hated that as I was expected to have the typical Asian woman’s build. Although I’m 5′3″, and weigh 110 lbs., I also have breasts (C cup)with a bit of a derriere. It may not sound big to others, but when you’re this size, you end up looking like the Asian version of Pam Anderson. Also, it’s automatically assumed I have implants because I have breasts. I find that quite annoying.
Another thing, coming from my own personal experiences, I’ve been approached by men of different backgrounds and not just White men. And they have this notion that Asian women are tighter down there. That’s disgusting! I’m more than what’s between my legs. And I’m not a sex toy for some man’s amusement.
Hello L.T.
Submissiveness was just my personal encounters. I felt more at ease with them than any white woman I’ve dated. Too bad there isn’t enough of them around here otherwise I would be in lala land…..lol
I’m sorry that you were approached with the preconceptions of being ‘tight’ down there. I think it’s pretty disgusting myself since I’m only one of few guys who actually carries morals with them.
People just don’t get the notion anymore of having a relationship without regards to sex in any way, shape or form.
What I meant by exotic was I think Asian women are unique in their own sense. Every race has a unique attribute, but Asian women, to me at least, being exotic meaning…..petite, slim, facial features esp. with the eyes. I love the eyes and I think it is one of many beautiful aspects of Asian women.
Of course it’s more than just physicality. It’s personality which matters most of course which varies person to person.
I’m only 5′7″ and I weigh 133 lbs. So of course I would like someone who is smaller than me. Being the typical white male and preferring the slim/petite type, Asian women have it going for me.
I just came across this post while doing a project in one of my classes. My parents were immigrants and I grew up Asian in an all-white neighbourhood. I am one of those admitted white-washed, banana/twinkie Asians. I identified with being a white person for years. It was a rude awakening to realise that caucasians didn’t see me as the same (i was roughly 9 years old at the time); i was suddenly stuck between two universes, one that i did not feel a part of but was supposed to feel a part of.
You said, “The danger of not coming to terms with being Asian in America is that it leads to self-hatred and insecurity. If you do not have your own image of being Asian, you will have the white image of what that means, stereotypes and all.”
I can attest to that. I battled with having the stereotypes of Asians particularly because I didn’t identify with them, and whatever I did feel, those were negative. I can admit that. I also dealt with a lot of self-hatred and I struggled with being Asian and having to contend with all those awful stereotypes that had nothing to do with me.
I don’t feel these things now. It has been a long, hard battle. It was very hard to deal with while growing up. But things are a lot better for me and I accept my past and look beyond those things now.
@ché:
Thank you for telling your experiences. I’m also the daughter of immigrant parents, and I grew up in an all-white neigborhood as well. Although I seemed the typical Westernized kid (born and raised in Canada), my parents made me very aware of my roots and that I would always be regarded as different or foreign by the people where I lived…no matter how assimilated I had become.
I knew one Asian friend now ex-friend, who was a twinkie (yellow on the outside, white on the inside), and she didn’t want any association with Asians. She always made negative comments about Asians when she was one herself!
I loathed her attitude as she was smug and considered herself superior. I eventually distanced myself from her because we always got into arguments about her stereotyping fellow Asian people to the point of being derogatory. I realized…by her being derogatory to Asians, how much she despised being Asian.
@ché:
Thanks for recounting your experiences Che. May you grow in strength!